A letter to my friend
Sadly I know that you will never get to read this letter and that I’ll never be able to share these thoughts with you, although I hope I’ve communicated them to you one way or another over the too few years I’ve known you.
I’m trying not to write in clichés but so many of them come to mind. I can’t help but say it…you truly are an inspiration to me, and I think to all the people whose lives you have touched.
I wish I’d known you earlier in my life; to have shared more of your goodness, your love and vitality, your courage, your appreciation of life itself and your ability to see the good in everything. I feel lucky to have shared the years and experiences and laughs and challenges and heartaches that we did. I’m thinking of knitting – especially the three fingered glove, notebooks, lists, cakes, recipes – and notating them, your beautiful children, our trip to Kendal and of course the traumatic illness and treatments you endured.
My overriding feeling is one of gratefulness. I’ve always had a sense of delight and surprise that you liked me. That may sound silly but to me you are everything that’s good and maybe I didn’t feel worthy. We became good friends and you showed me you cared, and I feel that must mean I’m worthy. I’ll never know if you felt it too. I know it was difficult for you to see in yourself what we all see in you.
Forgive me my tears, it’s hard to say goodbye. For me you’ll always be around, serene and inspiring as you always have been, in a special place in my heart and my life. You inspired my creativity and I don’t know what it will be yet but I will create something in your honour that will give me a place to express my feelings and love for you (it’s the thought that counts – don’t be offended if it goes the way of the glove!!).
With so much love to you my dear serene friend. I think of you often and I may still write to you from time to time if that’s ok – I’ve got one or two spare notebooks… x
“there are very few who possess something of that spirit that will brighten whatever they touch”